Unseen

There was work to be done. There are responsibilities to be met. This is growing up. In that moment, on the other hand, I wished to be far away from my laptop. I wished to lay there beside her and hold her as she slept. I wished to wrap my arms around her. Simply that. But there was work to be done.

Heteronormativity. Male Help-Seeking. Boring.

 I listened as she breathed. In. Out. Slowly. Each exhale, verging on a snore, sent shivers down my spine. I closed my eyes and retreated to the memory of a time when I believed she and I could make it. We still can. But I'm not what she's looking for.

"I'm waiting for Prince Charming," she said. My heart sank low, a feeling I was used to in her presence. Could she not see me? Could she not hear my heart pleading with her to love me?

A part of me believes she does. A part of me chooses to believe that she wants to catch my tears when they fall. A part of me never stopped believing that she loves me. But Rome wasn't built on hopes and dreams.

Morning will come. I will wake up and I will still be happy. I will smile. I will look her in the eyes and tell her I love her, because I do. Love, to me, was never about sex or any of that fluff we see in those cheesy romance movies. Love always has been and always will be that jolt of emotion I feel in my heart every time she looks at me. Love always has been and always will be the very best of me, which I have found in her.

I will take her as she will have me. 

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