Cult-i-vated

By: Lebogang Tlou

Jacky Nduna felt lost and alone. Nobody in this new world understood even the most basic truth about his life. Every morning, he would wake up, pull himself out of bed, get ready for work, and walk to work. His colleagues all had means of getting to work before he did. He, on the other hand, was late on a regular. Staying thirty minutes after the shop closed had become a part of his regular duties.
“It’s to make up for having been so late,” he would say lamely to his perplexed boss when asked why he wasn’t going home like everyone else. Truth was that there was absolutely nothing worth going home to. Jacky lived for the hours spent at the office. This was all the time he had for himself. Usually when he got home, he kicked off his work shoes, had a quick and lonely meal and went straight to bed.

At the end of the day, Jacky was tired. His hair had loosened from the bun he fashioned out of elastic bands, and his tie was skewed. His eyes were barely open behind his gold-rimmed sunglasses as he made his way down the hill from work and into the town. Jacky never saw a point in walking fast, as this was only a quick way to lose momentum and struggle on the last leg of the journey home – which was up another hill on the other side of town. Along the way, a text message came through saying that money had been deposited into his account. He abandoned his idle waste in getting home, turned right back around and called his special friend who dealt with redistributing whatever drug the paying clientele wished to partake in. He walked a short distance back up the hill, turned left and walked down a gravel road until he reached an orange house with a pink door. He knocked twice and stood at the threshold. The door opened, and an ageing European male with a heavy Irish accent opened the door.

“Ah, Jacky! Ye’r back fer a wee bit more fon, is ye?” Gollum the dealer said.
“Hey, Gollum,” Jacky yawned. “Nah, I’m too tired for ‘fon’. Please may I have a young bag and be on my way?”
“Naw probl’m, mate,” Gollum said. “Aye, ye might won get inside fer a bit of a toke, sonny. Ye doon’t lock te fine at ol.”
“That’d be amazing, actually,” Jacky replied, and followed the old man. In the lounge, there were trays stacked with cocaine, and heaps of marijuana crushed and ready to be either rolled or stacked into a bong. On the couch, with a bong straddled between her thighs, there sat a blonde female with the most athletic body Jacky had ever seen in his life. Idrina wasn’t from around. Idrina didn’t speak the language very well. Idrina spent most of her days in silence: going to lectures, writing, preparing for her practical assignments and sleeping made up her daily routine. On that day in particular, Idrina felt like a change of scenery, and so she decided that she would walk to a new part of the small town on the other side of the world to which she had journeyed to find herself in. She had no idea that the universe had plans for her. She decided to get herself wine and weed, and celebrate being free of Europe at long last. She had come to visit Gollum, an old friend of her old mum in the Netherlands.

“Hi,” he said awkwardly to her.
“Hello,” she said in a heavy Dutch accent.
“I’m Jacky,” said he, reaching in to fist-bump her. She bumped fists and introduced herself.
“Idrina van Nieple,” she said, and returned to what she was doing.
“Aye, Idrina ‘ere jus started up at the yon university over there,” Gollum said. “Idrina’s mum and I had oor wee bit o fun in the day, if yer knoo what I mean!”
“That’s cool,” said Jacky. “So you’re her father?”

There was a moment of silence, and the air in the room turned into an awkward one filled with silence.

“I never really knew my father,” Idrina said.
“An’ I din’t ken her mum ol tha’ well,” Gollum said.
“Oh,” was all Jacky could muster. Idrina passed him the bong while Gollum rolled them all a joint.
“So, Jacky, right?” Idrina offered.
“Yes, ma’am?” Jacky said.
“I am not a ma’am yet, friend,” Idrina laughed. “I am only 22.”
“I am twenty five going on twenty six, I-I’ll… Take ca-aaare… Of you…” Jacky sang sporadically. Idrina stared for a moment, and broke out laughing hysterically.
“I love the Sound of Music so much,” she said.
“I don’t know what made me sing that,” said he.
“Oi, stop wit that flirting!” Gollum chimed in. “Fer ol ye ken, tha’s me daughter, tha is!”
“Are you really my father?” Idrina asked.
“Lassie, I don knoo,” Gollum said lamely. To avoid getting involve d in what was obviously quickly becoming an awkward conversation, Jacky busied himself with rolling a fat joint. Idrina snorted a line, and Gollum followed.
“Why do they call you Gollum?” Jacky asked, an attempt at changing the topic.
“Yer mean tah tell me yer ‘avn’t figured it yerself there, lad?” Gollum laughed.
Jacky sat in silence for a bit and considered the question. The name was clearly a reference to the character from Lord of the Rings, however the character sitting across from him looked absolutely nothing like the horrid creature from the books. For a senior person, he was fit and strong and seemed to have a lot of years still in him – as opposed to Gollum from the book series, who was withered and nasty to behold. His home, albeit in a state, was fairly modern and beautifully furnished. As he looked around, a tall, black woman walked out of the bathroom. She had long, slender legs which protruded from her short high-waist bum-shorts, a crop top, and an amazing afro. Jacky choked on a puff of smoke when he saw her, and recovered by passing it along to Idrina, who said thank you with a pleasant smile.
“Who is this, baby?” the black woman asked.
“Oh, she may be me daughter, bu’ who knoos th’se things, eh?” Gollum jibed. The black woman was staring at Jacky, who averted his gaze and focused on Idrina’s knees.
“I meant who is he,” the black woman hissed.
“Oh, tha’s Jacky, tha’ is,” Gollum said. Before anyone could so much as blink, the black woman had a gun in her hand and was pointing it sideways at Jacky’s face.
“Gollum, you have twenty seconds to explain what this suit is doing in my house, smoking my weed, staring at what could be my stepdaughter’s knees so intently! One …”
“Shit, fam!” Jacky exclaimed, shocked by the unfolding scene. “I just came to buy weed, yo. Chill!”
“Who the fuck told you we sell?” the black woman pressed.
“I was here last week,” Jacky spluttered. “Gollum, call her off, man!”
“Bongi, Bongi! Relax! E’s great peoples, this laddie,” Gollum said, standing between the gun and Jacky now. “Relax yerself, beb!”

Bongi lowered her aim and stashed the pistol back somewhere behind her.
“You know I love it when you call me ‘beb’, right?” she said.
“Aye, I do,” said Gollum. He leaned in and kissed her. Idrina had been unmoved by any of what had transpired.
“Jacky, right?” Idrina asked. Happy for an opportunity to throw the target off his back, he snapped his neck in turning to face her.
“Yes,” he groaned.
“What is it that you do?” she asked. Jacky could sense Bongi listening intently, so he decided to be honest.
“I am an intern,” he replied.
“Where?” Idrina asked.
“At the sort of place where asking too many questions is okay,” said he.
“You brought a fucking journalist into my house?” Bongi shouted.
“E’s not a journalist! Are ye, laddie?” Gollum asked.
“Fuck, I just want to have sex with Idrina and go home,” Jacky said sounding defeated. Idrina blushed pink, Gollum laughed and even Bongi smiled.
“Really?” Idrina asked.
“Well, yeah,” Jacky said. “There’s something about almost getting killed that has me hard, and you’re the hottest sane person in this room right now, and I’m so inclined as it were.”
“He’s definitely a journalist,” Bongi said. She pushed Gollum aside and her gun was back in hand. “We have to kill him.”
“No!”
This time Idrina had risen, and was standing between Bongi and Jacky.
“He’s the only African who hasn’t been turned off by the fact that I’m white,” Idrina whispered. “I would like to keep him for myself.”

Jacky was confused. He was beginning to understand that he had walked into something far greater than what he had hoped for, and he wasn’t keen on dying that day, and so he played along. Idrina sat on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.
“You are mine,” she said.
“What the fuck is going on here?” Jacky asked.
“You are mine, and that’s all that matters,” Idrina said.

Bongi, satisfied that Jacky knew his place, took Gollum by the hand and lead him to another room. Moments later, the entire house was filled with loud screams of pleasure, and the room Idrina and Jacky now sat in alone was awkward and tense. She was still sitting on his lap. He was feeling aroused by her gentle movements to and fro, and he understood that she was going to have sex with him.
“Thanks for saving my life back there,” Jacky offered.
“Be quiet,” said Idrina. She stood and took off her clothes.
“Take off your clothes,” she ordered him. Jacky stripped down to his socks, and even kicked those off too. She took him by the hand and laid him down on the sofa. She got on top of him.

To Be Continued…